(Not Feeling My) Best Dressed

There is a stunning paradox in what I perceive to be American fashion culture.

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American fashion culture, which I will use to refer to the broad attitudes towards fashion and getting dressed in the United States, is a world of comfort in the every day. Something that has become very visible through the recent shift towards more relaxed workplace attire, our current obsession with sneakers, Birkenstocks, and Uggs, and the messy bun being a go-to hairstyle for teens, moms, and everyone in between. People from other countries often joke about how you can tell if someone is American and it’s always because they are wearing workout clothes or sneakers even if they are not going to the gym. I myself certainly enjoy dressing for comfort while still looking cute, which is evident in how much I love wearing Nap Dresses.

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The paradox, however, comes into play in how we are also a fashion culture that is very preoccupied with appearances. Plastic surgery and cosmetics are two large industries in the United States. Everyone is trying to keep up with the Joneses. For instance, despite its insane price, the Dyson Air Wrap has become a wishlist item for many. Even though we are a culture that claims to value comfort, we are also a culture that still is very much fixated on appearances. To make sense of it: being comfortable should not mean looking overly comfortable.

This paradox is where I would like to start this article. We exist in a state of limbo; but, it can become challenging during periods where we really do just need to be comfortable. And I am not talking about going to the gym without makeup or wearing snow boots that while warm, are not exactly cute. What I am talking about are our mental health episodes. Moments, when everything just feels like too much, and the thought of having to brush your hair, let alone put on even a little bit of makeup, is so overwhelming that you want to cry. I am talking about days where you are just so exhausted from lack of sleep, whether it be due to anxiety or a particularly bad flare-up, that you just want to stay in bed a little longer; but, alas, you have to go to class and just want to be comfortable.

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Something that I find myself struggling with as someone who loves putting on makeup and doing her hair and wearing cute outfits is how on these bad days, I feel self-conscious and insecure about not being “put together”. Logically, I know that no one cares about what I wear to class, since we’re here to get an education, not to judge what the person across from us is wearing or not wearing; yet, this pressure to look good and “put together” at all times just becomes overwhelming. I feel ashamed even, for not just sucking it up and putting on some makeup anyway, since I should try and make myself look “presentable” and not “lazy.” The crazy part is that I don’t even feel this way towards other people nor was I raised in a household focused on experiences; it was what was in your heads that really mattered. Furthermore, as my friends will point out to me, it is not as if I am wearing pajamas and a hoodie with holes and stains to class, I’m just wearing flared yoga pants and no makeup, which is something that other people wear to class too. Simply put: it’s not that deep.

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Fashion and makeup for me are things that do and should bring joy, rather than feel like a chore at the best, and a mask to hide ourselves from the world at the worst. This is really more of a thoughts dump and rambling than an article, but the point is that although I cannot speak for everyone, I know that at least statistically speaking, there has to be at least a few other people who have experienced similar emotions, and what I really want is for us to be kinder to ourselves and allow ourselves the grace to not always be “put together.” Sometimes just getting up and going to class is enough.

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